How to School Satan

"30 pounds of cookie dough!"

Our investigator placed a massive pan piled high with cookie dough in my arms and sent me off to the kitchen table with half a dozen cookie cutters and enough wax paper to wrap a mummy, before flipping on Beyonce Christmas and dancing out of the room.

Mmmmmkkkkkkkkk.

We'd asked our investigator to "help" us make cookies to give out to ward members, people in need, and some friends for Christmas, in hopes that we could spend some "quality time" together and warm her heart with some service. 5 hours, 30 pounds of dough, WAY too much "sampling" of the goodies, and a whole sink full of dirty dishes later.....we sat down in front of almost 150 cookies, ready to then be decorated. 

Our investigator picked up the first cookie, started drizzling on the icing, and then announced, "And, girls, the fun doesn't end here! We still have the cheesecakes, the cake pops, and the brownies to make after this!" 

My stomach just about FLOPPED. 

Luckily, we'd arranged to go caroling as a district that evening, so we were "forced" to cut out early, but not before we'd loaded our entire trunk full of cookie bags.....AND our investigator proved that night that she'd make a GREAT RS Compassionate Service Coordinator. All we have to do is get her baptized now.... ;)

Speaking of caroling, we all went out that night, chose a member to visit, and then decided to carol to a few of their neighbors as well. We grabbed cookie bags and then hit up their neighbors across the street. We began singing, and after a LONG wait, an older woman came to the door. She waited till we'd finished a rather rough verse of "Hark the Herald Angel Sing," before opening the screen door and snapping, "Who are you?!" Sis Green extended the bag of cookies and said we were just wanting to bring some Christmas cheer and asked if she'd like some cookies. The woman retorted, "Nope! Can't have them!! I'm not interested! I suppose you guys think you're pretty....pretty....  what's the word you all use now days?? 'Awesome'....yea, awesome. All that means is that you think you know everything.....and you don't. So no, I'm not interested! And that goes for your singing too!" and slammed the door (which....I should mention, had a bright red banner reading "JOY" hanging across the front.....I'm confused;). 

.....Well....Merry Christmas anyways....

We all walked away kinda stunned, not sure if we should laugh or cry. Instead we just visited house after house until an adorable African American couple opened their door, came outside, and started singing along, swaying, and praising God (Baptist style:), till we'd finished our performance and then gave us an enthusiastic applause. AND....they actually took the cookies:)

>>Fist-bump<<

Christmas was another adventure:) On Sunday, the widow in our ward who was going to host us Christmas day, came up and introduced herself to me, and then added, "Oh...and did Sis Green tell you?? We're going to have a jammy party on Christmas Day!"

.....I'm sorry, what??.....

She continued, "I'm 76 years old....and I've never had a jammy party....so on Christmas Day, be sure to wear your best jammies, because we're going to make a day of it, ok??"

Yep. On Christmas Day, I had a "jammy" party with a 76 year old:)! hahaha! It was unforgettable to say the least! She was so grateful, though, to have us over since this is her first Christmas as a widow and it was so rewarding to see the impact it made on her holiday. I really did feel like we were serving the Lord that day, as we sat there and she shared pictures and stories with us about her life, her late husband, and her family. 

We also got to SKYPE HOME!!! AH!!!! It's still SO weird to think that the next time I see them, I'll be walking off the plane (as an oh, so awkward RM:)!! I was already awkward enough over Skype.....especially when meeting the new in-laws:) Yea, sorry Zach and Rachel....I'll try and make up for it in person;) hahahah! It really was SO good to see everyone's faces and to reconnect, though. I miss family a lot out here, so Christmas Day and Mother's Day mean the world to me:) love you fam!! 3 months....3 months!!

The Lord's also been blessing us with people to teach this week as well. On Monday, as we were sitting in Panera writing friends and family, one of the waiters came up to clear our table, and as he turned to go, he read my name tag. "Sister?? Are you from a church or something??"

That's our cue.

We told him who we were, and started giving him a brief explanation of what we believed and why we were out serving as missionaries. He'd listen for a little bit, then excuse himself to go back to work, then he'd come back ten minutes later and ask more questions, and back and forth until finally, we asked him if we could meet sometime to talk about religion. He agreed, gave us his phone number, and accepted a Book of Mormon. I'm now a firm believer in Panera. That's the second investigator I've found on my mission by eating at Panera:) We're meeting with him this week, and praying that he accepts the invitation to be baptized!!

Our other....unique.....lesson of the week was with our investigator, Norine. She's a hoot:) She's around 50 yrs old, has fiery hot pink hair, and when I first met her, she went off for over 15 minutes about her recent appearance on Judge Judy where she sued her granddaughter......and won:)

Yeeeeaaaaa;)

We finally got to the lesson portion of our visit, where we'd planned on showing her the Restoration DVD. We started by introducing her to various scriptures in the Bible (her father was a Baptist minister so she knows her Bible well) that prophecy about the restoration of the gospel. We hadn't gone far, when we heard moans and rustling noises coming from the nearby bedroom. The door was open and we could see the foot of the bed, where a man was lying. Then, almost out of nowhere, we heard him turn over and start violently puking off the side of the bed into a trash can. 

Sis Green and I just looked at each other, tried to focus again, and continued, until Norine yelled into the other room,"Willie!!! You wanna go to the hospital?!?!" We just sat there awkwardly while he brushed her off, and she turned back to us with, "That's my brother-in-law. He's REALLY sick, girls. Sorry.....continue..."

.......Ummmmm.....ok......

We managed to get past the scriptures and introduced the video. She popped it in and pretty soon the First Vision scene was starting. I swear.....Satan does E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G. he can to ruin that moment....and therefore, disrupt the spirit. Kids getting hurt, pets making noise, the phone ringing, gunshots firing outside, spouses barging in, the fire alarm going off.....yep, seen it all. It's actually an unusual experience to have the First Vision read, recited, or watched without something--anything--in someway or another becoming a distraction. THIS time around, though....it was a whole new ballpark. The closer the "humble kneeling, sweet appealing" moment got, the harder I started praying for 3 minutes.....just 3 minutes....of break time before the hurling began again. 

BUT.....that didn't happen.

RIGHT before the heavens opened, Willie's stomach decided to do so first. Just as the Mo Tab started swelling, so did his dinner from the night before,  and it was by NO means quiet. Sis Green and I just sat there praying for divine intervention and trying our best to focus on Norine and the movie. Norine, without breaking focus on the screen, but clearly aware of the background bedroom noises, picked up the remote and FLOORED the + volume button. 

That brought back the spirit soon enough....the whole complex probably heard it:) hahaha! 

Whatever works, right?? Sis Green and I are still getting lots of laughs over that one:) By the end of the film, Willie had rolled over, and we enjoyed the last 10 minutes of our visit without distractions, as we asked her, "Do you think a boy--Joseph Smith--could have been visited by God and Jesus Christ?"

She thought about it for a moment, and then smiling, responded, "Absolutely! God can do anything!!"

Satan......SCHOOLED.

Sis Green and I definitely walked away from that visit, with a firm testimony of the Spirit's ability to testify......despite all odds:)! Norine was touched by our message and agreed to come to church, read from the Book of Mormon, and pray about it's truthfulness!! 

The work is working:) Our area is difficult, but Sis Green and I are setting goals and making plans to find and teach more. We're enjoying the companionship of the Spirit on a daily basis, and it is carrying us through. This week of Christmas prompted me to reflect on the gift of my Savior, as the feelings of loneliness and homesickness became harder to ward off. As I thought about Him, His birth, and the lonely circumstances in which He was born and lived, I was reminded again that He knows my situation and my struggles perfectly. The scripture in Moses 6:34, where the Lord beckons, "Walk with me" came to my mind as I laid in bed Christmas Eve, missing home and family. 

I've felt Him extending that invitation to me many times this week, as I've allowed my thoughts and feelings to drift inward. He's reminded me to walk with Him....and in doing so, I find myself turning outward. And it is such a sweeter experience! I truly do have the opportunity and blessing every day of my mission life, and beyond, to walk with Him as I choose to walk the path He wants me to walk. It requires effort and sacrifice, but I see evidence of His appreciation and love all around me as I do so. It is rewarding! And the relationship I'm developing with Him because of it.....I wouldn't trade for the world!

Onward and upward,

Sis Anna Parker 

(pics to come soon........these library computers won't let me upload:/)

Car Accidents, Creeps, and Awkward Convos

We have a less-active we're working with who we keep trying to get to church, read scriptures, fulfill a calling, etc. and this week we wanted to either give HIM a good laugh, OR.......we wanted to see if he's actually reading the assignments we give him....SO.....our text convo goes something like this....:

Us: Hey Bro P--! Are you coming to church on Sunday?

Bro P: Maybe

Us: Well, we'd love to see you there! Oh, and here's a scripture we thought you'd like, 1 Nephi 2:15. Let us know what you think!

[STOP here and go read 1 Nephi 2:15]

Bro P: Nice :)

Us: Did you read it? ;)

Bro P: No not, yet. But I will

Bro P (five minutes later): That's a good one...I recall a conference talk on that not too long ago.

FAIL.......F-A-I-L.

Well....now we know he doesn't do his reading.  Great......Gotta love them less-actives;)

I should mention………….Sis Bishop got us in a car accident this week. NBD. On a P-day. She looked over at me at a stop light....AND pressed on the gas at the same time. Too bad there was a truck in front of us;) Love that girl!  Luckily, it wasn't too bad....just a fender bender that ripped our license plate off and gave me chest pains for an hour afterwards....BUT on the good side....the guy she hit, didn't care about the minor damage to his car, so he waved us off with, "Oh I don't care as long as you guys are ok!"

What. a. gem.

Aaaaaaaaaand he had a s.i.c.k. mustache too....like handelbar status. #swag:) He was SO nice to us......and so was Elder Taggart (the office elder who manages the cars;)….Were going into the shop soon......

We got a phone call this week telling us that Yung had had a fall and is in a care facility, recovering from a minor surgery:( She's apparently going to be back home as soon as they can work out a care plan for her where she can have someone with her 24/7. Until then....she asked HER church members to call US to have us come water her roses and care for her garden till she gets home. #feelingneeded #mormonstatus #winnerwinnerchickendinner    hahaha!

Aaaaaaannnnddddd......the "Boys Across the Street" saga continues....we've met with one and then another, sometimes two and sometimes three of them...off and on this week. Unfortunately, none of them came to church this week, but we're pretty sure if we can get one, we'll get them all;) New mormon message maybe?? That's what we're shooting for;) hahaha!

One of them, we're trying to get interested in the church vs. the state.....(A.K.A the gospel versus the girl teaching the gospel:) hahaha.....it's uh.....interesting;) Boys....they're crazy:)

We've also been teaching a guy from RUSSIA!!! Joseph....you should be proud;) His name is Lev and he brought his friend Stan with him. We're starting to teach them English at the church building once a week......it's always an party;) This week...we were a bit scatter-brained because neither of us have ever taught English, and so we're newbies with no idea what we're doing. They enjoyed the lesson, though, and want to come back....good sign I'm assuming;) haha!

Lev wants to learn more idioms…..(I’m now trying to separate Twitter idioms from English idioms;)…..especially the one, “Speaking of the devil!”

He tells us, “Why you say that? Why call me a devil!? I not the devil! You Americans….no make sense. Strange….strange.”

He’s gotta point……

Afterwards, we took them on a tour of the church building, and ended up in the chapel. When they saw the organ and the piano, the “Oooo's” and “ahhhh's” came flowing......as did the many stories of pipe organs and angelic choirs of Europe. Aaaaannnddd...then....of course......the question we were dreading, "You have a choir, right?"

Uhhhhh...yes.....BUT....I don't think it's exactly what you think it is. We ain't no Monteverdi. Or even Mo-Tab for that reason. ]

SO...divert their attention……and instead...we took them up on the stand, I flipped on the organ, and began to play. Soon Sis Bishop and I started to sing, "Nearer My God To Thee" and the spirit FILLED the room. It was p.o.w.e.r.f.u.l. They stood there quietly, and just listened. Afterwards, the first thing they said was,

"When does church start on Sunday? What should we wear? Can we listen to the scriptures being read in English? Where should we sit? Does your congregation do donations?"

Ah!!! It was amazing! And I gained a testimony of the power of hymns and music to touch hearts!!! (And...those organ lessons....turns out....maybe.....sorta.....kinda.....payed off:) haha!

We've resorted to doing service for investigators we have a hard time meeting with. It gets us in faster…..oddly enough;) Sooooo……how bout walking their dogs??  Shrup. Oh, and come to find, it's a great conversation starter too while you're passing other dog-walkers;) #strategy.

But then, there always comes the questions from members on Sunday, "Sisters.....were you by chance walking a large German Shepherd down Main St on Friday??" 

Weeeeeeell .......here's the thing......:) Hey, at least we're getting noticed now....

I'm still teaching deaf friends online....skpying and having a blast! It's amazing to see the Lord blessing me as I pick up the language more and more. The gift of tongues should have a sub-label of the gift of hands;) hahaha! #nerdalert;) lol

Saturday morning, I had my first "Time to get out of this lesson.....NOW" experience.

We dropped by to visit an investigator and soon after we sat down, we asked her what she wanted out of life. She told us she wanted independence....the type that would come from "massive wealth" and “being subject to no one."  We went with it, but eventually, I started getting really uneasy….like we needed to back out ASAP.  We started wrapping up, and got on the topic of inviting her to church. She got very quite, and almost zoned out when we asked her if she wanted to attend. Eventually, she told us firmly "No." After asking her why, she literally hissed, "No. No. I don't trust anyone. I can't trust people....I've been let down too much, especially those who are so-called Christians."

As soon as she said that, I was hit by a wave of darkness. It's the most disturbing feeling you will E.V.E.R. get. It was absolutely chilling. All I was waiting for was eye contact with my companion before tailing it to the door. In desperation, I began praying, asking for the spirit to come back into my heart and mind.

In my mind, the words came, "Focus your thoughts on me. Testify and then leave."

Immediately, I imagined the Savior. And immediately, that light was restored in my heart. I felt filled with the conviction that the power of God was greater than the power of the devil. I opened my mouth and testified that all things are possible through God, and that His power is second to none. I told her I knew that God was real, and that the gospel was true. Immediately, the darkness in my mind began to leave.

I've never walked taller.

It was a haunting experience, yea, but I left that lesson, knowing that the power of God FAR outweighs the power of the adversary. I KNOW that the only way to true satisfaction and happiness is through Jesus Christ. He truly is the Light.  I felt that!

His power will always be greater, and when we side with Him, we side with victory. We’re on the winning team, and no one and nothing can stop this work. Don’t let anything stop your testimony from growing either! That light and happiness cannot be found anywhere but in this gospel and in Jesus Christ!!!

The Church is so true, I can’t even believe it!:)

 Onward and upward,

Sister Anna Parker