I'm Where I'm Meant to Be

  I was introduced to our newest house pets this week. COCKROACHES. aghablaghegalghahbeghah!!!! Yep.....that's an understatement.

They've taken up residency in the bathroom and I've now got into the habit of flipping on the light before entering and hoping that that 30 second warning was enough for them to take a hint.......before I walk in and start using every toiletry weapon in site to smash the little buggers. If anything, it's entertainment for Sis Green:)

And at least they don't fly......right?........right?! :)

Tuesday afternoon we were invited to a part-member's home for lunch. I'd met them once before and they're a sweet adorable older couple. I was on exchanges and took the lead in the lesson, which went well. I still felt like our invitation to them to come to church wasn't fully accepted, but I was at a loss as to how to connect with them and help them understand our love and concern for them. We were about to wrap up, when I got the impression to ask Art (the husband who's a member) how to pronounce his last name. He responded, 

"Lahtinen.....it's Finnish."

Before I could even think, I blurted out, "No way! My Dad served there on his mission, and lived there for three years when my grandpa was a mission president there, and my grandpa served there too, and we learned Finnish growing up, and we have all kinds of Finnish traditions at Christmas......" and basically I just blasted him with all the info on my all-but-actually-blood-born Finnish family! And it was exactly what created an instant connection between us and he began telling me all about his Finnish parents and childhood! It was incredible to see how the Spirit used one small seemingly random prompting to help me build such a unique connection and friendship with this less-active! we were then able to revisit the topic of church attendance, and they committed to try and come, and to pray together as a couple!!! Gosh....the spirit is amazing:)

Sis Green and I have been trying hard to know our purpose in this area. It's been a difficult couple of weeks, and I feel that the Lord is testing our faith and dilligence. We're trying to stay positive, though, and we've been feeling repeated promptings to start working more with members. I just want to leave my mission and this area knowing that I made a difference and I feel like I'm running out of time! AH! It's a bit overwhelming at times, but it's motivating me to pray more, work harder, and stay closer to the Spirit!

I had a beautiful experience this week which started as our district was sitting together at lunch. One of the elders casually mentioned the name of a member in the ward, and for some reason it perked my interest. I'd obviously never met the family, but felt an instant attraction to them. Then, the next night, another ward member mentioned them in passing, and that was my second witness. I told Sis Green that night that we needed to meet them, so acting in faith, I called them up and the husband welcomed our visit. Long story short......they ended up not actually living in our area (they actually lived quite a ways out), the wife is not a member, and the husband is actually a returning less-active!!

Turns out, they invited us over for dinner (!!!! this is kind of a huge deal in this area:) and we were able to get to know them better. It didn't hit me, however, until we were actually in their home and sitting across from them, that the Spirit had been driving me to that point the entire time. I'd subconsciously just felt that it was a hunch or "a good idea" but when we were there, and began teaching them more about the atonement and our Savior, the Spirit confirmed to me, "This is RIGHT where you are meant to be tonight. And this all happened because you chose to follow promptings."

I can't even describe how much I needed that personal and loving impression from the Spirit! Just that same evening, I'd broke down crying to Sis Green, expressing my frustration because I felt that I wasn't receiving clear direction on my purpose here. I felt that I was just a smile and a name tag......just another missionary passing through. I felt aimless, and wondered if I even mattered. 

I still get those feelings sometimes, and I'm still discovering what I specifically have to offer this area and these people, but that whispering from the spirit that night confirmed to me that as long as I'm trying.....as long as I'm listening to Him and following His will....

I'm RIGHT where I need to be.

And that's all that matters. So for now, I'm just keeping a prayer in my heart and the song in my head, "I'll go where you want me to go, dear Lord, I'll be what you want me to be."

Onward and upward,

Sister Anna Parker

Ask Anna

Lovelies!!

Notice the new gadget in the sidebar???

Yep. Just for you:) 

Over the past year, I've been getting emails, messages, and letters from you beautiful blog readers all across the globe, and your questions for me range from 

"How do I share the gospel with my friends?" 

to 

"What advice do you have for a soon-to-leave missionary?" 

to 

"Why did you decide to serve?"

I decided to add a gadget to the blog to make it easier for you to ask me questions!! (and hopefully I can keep up with responses:)!!  Just click on the "Ask Anna" gadget to send me your questions!

I don't claim to know the answer to every doctrinal stumper, or how to share the gospel with anyone anywhere, or even everything you need to know before, during, and (heaven knows) after the mission.....BUT...that being said, I absolutely LOVE sharing what I've picked up and learned along the way and let's be honest.....

missionary work is one of my all time f.a.v.o.r.i.t.e. hobbies:) 

Hearing from you girls (and guys;) and getting the chance to help you out with your missionary work and prep is a HIGHLIGHT of my mission experience!!

So if you've got questions....SEND THEM MY WAY!!

We're all in this together

<3

so keep shining, lovelies! 

Onward and upward,

Sister Anna Parker 

check out the gadget this way -------->

The Honest Truth About Missions

"So are you getting paid to do this?"

"Nope"

"Are you getting some kind of school credit?"

"No"

"What about church promotion?"

"Nope"

"Well how about community recognition?"

"Definitely not"

"Then why would you EVER choose to do what you're doing??"

He had a point. I'd been talking to one of our investigators about missions and how we work as missionaries, and his final question wasn't foreign in my mind. I'd asked myself that question many times. 

You asked for honest. Here's honest.

I believe many--my pre-mission self included--have a warped opinion of what it's like to be a missionary. Before I put on the tag, I had only a vague idea of what it was really like to actually be in those shoes.

I thought they were perfect.
I thought they were always happy.
I thought they loved every minute of their service.
I thought they were invincible.
I thought they didn't have a care in the world.
I thought it was probably hard work, but easy to love.
I thought they were almost always successful.
I thought that it was easy for them to sacrifice.

It seems like a lifetime away since I lived life not as a missionary. In the time that's followed--now 14 months into my mission--I've come to see missionaries and missions in a completely different light.

"Sister Parker, missions are 98% hard work, struggle, disappointment, difficulty, sorrow, and even pain. 2%.......2% is pure joy," my mission president told me during one of our first interviews together.

He was right. SO right.

Here's the honest truth: missionaries hide a lot. Sometimes it's behind a smile as someone slams the door in our face after cussing us out. Other times it's behind closed doors when we fall to our knees, sobbing and begging for the help of The Lord to carry us through. And at other times, it's only disclosed in a simple journal entry reading, "Why aren't we seeing more success?" or "Why is this so hard??" Investigators don't see the tears we cry the night they've told us they're no longer interested in meeting with us. The strangers on the street don't see our hearts sink when they refuse to listen and instead call us names. The family members back home don't see the long sleepless nights when we can't think of anything but the faces of those we miss. The members don't see our pain when ten minutes before church, an investigator calls to say he won't be able make it. And even our companions don't always see our exhaustion after a long and difficult day.



Let's get raw:

I'm not perfect.
I'm not always happy.
I don't always love every minute of it.
I'm not invincible.
I struggle.
It's hard back-breaking work, and not always easy to love.
I'm not always successful.


And it is HARD to sacrifice.

I've missed the weddings of two siblings.

I’ve missed the farewell of a brother leaving to serve in Russia and

I’ll soon miss the farewell of another brother leaving to serve in Portland, Oregon.
I've had more medical problems on the mission than I have my entire life.
I've been called every name in the book, and been harassed for what I believe.
I've struggled with difficult companions, areas, and people.
I've spent long and lonely nights, aching for help and comfort.
I miss home and family every. single. day.

I’ve cried more tears in the last 14 months than I have in the last 14 years.
I question my ability to succeed often.
I feel completely inadequate to meet the needs of those around me.

I often feel weak, lonely, exhausted, frustrated, disappointed, and homesick.

And yet…….my mission president continued, “Sister Parker, missions are 98% hard work, struggle, disappointment, difficulty, sorrow, and even pain. 2%.......2% is pure joy…….  
And somehow that 2% makes it ALL WORTH IT.

I don’t even know how it’s possible. Serving as a missionary is THE hardest thing I have ever done. By far. It’s more demanding, challenging, and draining than anything I’ve ever experienced.

And somehow…..somehow……it is all worth it.

Yes…I struggle.

Yes…I fall.

Yes...I long for home and family.

Yes…I miss the comforts I gave up.

Yes…I often wish people understood how much we sacrifice just to bring them the gospel and make their lives better.

Yes…I’m FAR from perfect.

Yes…I’m weak and inadequate.

And YES…..my mission has transformed me and others into people we wouldn’t have been without it. Therefore, YES…..it is worth it.

That pure joy—PURE JOY—that President told me about……I had no idea what that was like until I became a missionary and have seen the gospel change lives, including mine. Most of the time, the joy we experience as missionaries isn’t even our own. It’s the joy we feel seeing others experience the joy of the gospel……Yes, it doesn’t come often. It takes HARD work to get. But it is PURE. It’s a joy I’ve never felt before in my entire life. And I believe it is a type of joy that few will ever feel. And it comes only to those who are willing to sacrifice everything for the Lord in order to receive it.

So yes….. I’ve often thought and often been asked: "Why would I EVER choose to do what I do??"

It IS hard. It doesn’t even make since to the outside world why young missionaries like me would go out for 18-24 months, paying thousands of dollars to go, abide by such strict rules, live such a rigorous schedule, have such limited communication with family and friends, and all just to share a message about Jesus Christ and His restored gospel.

I do it because IT’S TRUE. I would not be here….doing this, sacrificing like this….if I didn’t know with all my heart that it is true. It has changed my life, and I continue to see it change others’ lives.

 That is undeniable.

I can’t even begin to describe to someone why, specifically, being a missionary is so incredibly difficult. 
It’s much harder than I’ll ever be able to express. But while, I don’t believe my mission will ever be easy…..nor that sacrifice or conversion will ever be easy…….I KNOW that with the help of God, it’s worth it.

  

Now go hug a missionary ……... they need it:)

[To read the original  post click HERE]

I FOUND HER!!!!

On Tuesday we met up with Lev, Stan, and now a new friend from India to teach English. We started into traveling and vacation terms, now that summer’s in full swing. I begin listing vocab on the board….."ticket,” “itinerary,” “portal,” “TSA,” and then “flight attendant.”

They looked a bit puzzled when I put that last one up, so I began explaining…..”a person who works on an airplane, helps passengers, brings you snacks, etc…..also called a stewardess…..”

Lev then leans back with a smile, “Ooooooohhhhh……YES. I understand.”

Perfect. So I run the drill: “How would you put that word in a sentence?”

Without hesitating, he starts, “A flight attendant…is also called a stewardess, and is VERY beautiful, and young, and attractive, and usually has long beautiful hair, and brings you everything you need.” He then goes on with a wink, “Maybe you work as our flight attendant after you’re a missionary??”

Ummmmmmmmmm……..NO.      Ain’t that type...

MOVING. ON.

“’Pilot’…..next word is ‘PILOT’……” hahaha! Gotta love it. There’s never a dull moment when teaching two 60-year olds English as a second language:) lol

Thursday, we went to Feed My Starving Children as a Zone and ……OH MY GOSH……funnest service project e.v.e.r.!!! We TORE up that place (between hearing Mumford and Sons sing “I will wait, I will wait for you!” over the boombox speakers with an accompanying elder of the group shouting,

“Oh, NO SHE WON’T!”

Couldn’t. Stop. Laughing!   lol!   Girls….he’s got a point:) Anyways……by the end, we’d packed over 40 boxes of meals at ONE station, and in total packaged enough meals to feed over 115 kids for a YEAR!!!   Woop woop!!!   


#TeamBuffaloGroveZone      #repthehood     #ldsswag

Wednesday, we showed up to district meeting, and after we were finished, headed to the baptism closet to find a jumpsuit for Bethany’s baptism (!!!!!). We opened the closed only to find that the O.N.L.Y. sizes available were XX-XXXX Large (yea, didn’t even know they made suits that big….things you learn as a missionary;) or a Youth Medium.

That’s not gonna cut it for a slim 5 foot 8 young woman wanting to get baptized.

So we keep scouring the closet, digging through pile after pile of white clothing and eventually recruiting the help of the elders. EHHHH….not the smartest move.

Convo that followed:

Elder P--, pulling out a white XXX jump suit: “WAY too big. It looks like something you’d wear to clean a porter potty.”

Elder G--, lifting up a white dress, trying to figure out the wide collar:  “Oh! It’s a scarf! Oh, she’ll love that!”

Elder P--, finding another dress with an oversized scoop drape collar, and mistaking it for a hood:

“Whoa….that’s like KKK status.”

Me, holding up a thin, lacey, and slightly yellowed dress: “That looks like something your grandma would die in.”

Sister Bishop, finding a Youth Large, and holding it up to herself: “It could just ride right below her knee. That’s not too weird, right?”

F.A.I.L.

After 30 minutes of no luck, we finally decided to take what we had (Shrek-sized jumpsuits, and century-old nightgowns) to give Bethany “options” (riiiiiiiight). Our wardrobe unveiling that night at her house was C.L.A.S.S.Y. ……like red carpet status.

Luckily, we have b.o.m.b. Zone Leaders who were champs and found us an adult small jumpsuit at their chapel in Gurnee, and it fit PERFECTLY.

Saved by grace, after all we could do;) lol

Annnnnnddddd…..speaking of BAPTISMS……BETHANY  IS OFFICALLY  A MEMBER OF THE CHURCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!     AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

It was one of the most beautiful and happy days of my mission!!! I’ve loved every minute I’ve had to spend teaching Bethany (though we really didn’t teach her much…she kinda knew it all already since she’s been studying up on it for over a year)!!! I’ve grown SO close to that girl, I love her! I’ve made a new bestie, and it’s i.n.c.r.e.d.i.b.l.e. knowing that I got to play a small part in her conversion!!!

[OK…if you just skipped over that last paragraph…..start reading HERE:]

REWIND……

Story time:

So 2 days before I opened my mission call (yea, as it was sitting on the kitchen counter…..longest. two. days. of. MY. L.I.F.E.), I was praying late one night……stressing over the mission, wondering what my companions would be like, how many people I'd be able to teach, what my mission president would be like, if I'd love my areas, see people get baptized, have fun, be free of hardships.....ya know, the uge that pre-mi’s worry about....and then....

I had to STOP.

I paused and realized how selfish I was being. My prayers were all about ME......MY wants, MY desires, MY life, MY fears, ME...ME...ME. In that moment when I stopped, took a step back, and re-evaluated what I was saying, the spirit spoke clearly to my mind,

"Anna......someone TONIGHT  is praying that YOU will bring them the gospel!"

I bawled. Straight up, knelt there and cried for over a half hour. I was completely struck by the power of those words, and their accompanying meaning. 

This mission isn't about ME. None of it. I realized in that moment that I wasn't going out here for ME. I wasn't sacrificing for ME, leaving home for ME, or giving up all I loved for ME. It was for that person...that ONE that needed ME. 

Well guess what???

I FOUND HER!!!!!!!!!!!!

One year ago, Bethany was praying for sister missionaries to come. She knew that she wanted the gospel in her life, and even wanted to meet with the missionaries, but she wanted--needed--SISTERS. 

One year ago, I was praying for me.......but was told......ANOTHER was praying for me....to come. 

All along our way, teaching Bethany, I wondered if she was the one that had been praying for me to come. I wasn't sure, though it seemed possible. In fact, I didn't know for sure until, standing at the top of those font steps, I watched as Bethany came up out of that water, smiling and literally glowing! It hit me so hard,

"SISTER PARKER, YOU FOUND HER!!! YOU FOUND HER!!!"

 There is NOTHING like that feeling in the ENTIRE world!!!!! To know that you—through God’s help—did it! You found the one who needed you, who prayed for you to come!!! I couldn’t contain my happiness!!!! I’ve never felt happier in MY LIFE!!!!  

That night, we went over to Bethany’s to visit her and to practice for a choir number we and the young women were invited to sing in Sacrament Meeting the following day. The three of us sat there together, basking in the joy and happiness of the day as we began singing “Come Unto Christ.”

[BTW, if you don’t know this song…..go listen to it HERE….it’s b.e.a.u.t.i.f.u.l.]

We sat around that table, as rain came down softly outside and sang, “Come unto Christ, come unto Him. And by His grace be made, holy again. He’s calling your name. He’s waiting for you, with arms open wide. Come unto Christ!”

I wouldn’t have traded that moment--singing those words and looking into Bethany’s eyes--for the WORLD!!! I’ve never felt the spirit stronger! I broke down when we were finished with the song and told Bethany about my experience praying before the mission. All I could say to her at the end was,

“YOU make it ALL WORTH IT!!!!”

The heartache, the homesickness, the fatigue, the failure, the rejection, the sacrifice, the bitterness, the pain, the loneliness, the hardship……it is ALL WORTH IT!!!

Missions are worth it. They’re hard, but they. are. worth. it!!!! There are “one’s” that are out there waiting for you to reach out to them, to find them, to help them, and to bless their lives eternally. Whether you’re a full-time missionary or a member missionary…..they are out there! They’re waiting for YOU!!!

And you’re perhaps the ONLY one who can find and help them! Don’t wait! They need you NOW!!!!

IT IS ALL WORTH IT!!!!

Onward and Upward,

Sister Anna Parker

towel #6!!!

#besties:)

couldn't be happier!!!

Memories and Meth

Friday is one of those days that's always kinda rough. The work starts slowing down before the weekend when the "normal" world gets all busy with weekend adventures, chores, and events, while we're in missionary bubble trying to get in contact with people, teach, serve, and not think about up-coming P-day too much.


Sooooooooo....what better way to mix it up than to prank your companion?

Sis B and I are always looking for a good laugh (hey, it's how we role;), so I decided to "make her day"......wink wink...... One word:

KOOLAID

Hmmmmmm........koolaid plus a shower head?......perfection.

Ten minutes before Sis B hopped in the shower, I went and sprinkled Koolaid in the shower head, screwed it back on, and then....of course.....acted all nonchelant walking out. I know....I'm a brat;)  

Five minutes later, I hear the shower go on and..........wait for it........then comes the peals of laughter and "Sister Parker!!!! You're SO dead!!" 

L.O.L.

Yea, that bout sums up our relationship.     #laughterluvrs     #4lyf

Later that week, we went to help Yung again.....HIGHLIGHT. of. the. week. She opens the door, smiling and waving, and then takes us by the hand to her back yard. She points to the water spout where water is leaking from the attached hose.

"LOOK! LOOK! Too much water! Come out! Not good!"

Getting the hunch that she wanted us to fix her leaky pipe, we went over with her to start fiddling with it. Sister Bishop started cranking the handle--the WRONG way--and sure enough, water starts spraying ALL over YUNG. 

Poor 90 year old woman gets water dripping from her glasses, streaming down her face, and splashed all over her clothes....and then turns to Sister Bishop t.o.t.a.l.l.y. speechless. Then out of the blue, she starts seizing with giggles. If vertically rolling in laughter is a thing....that's what she did. The cutest little high-pitched, almost totally-silent laughter, with her eyes squinted tight and her hand over her mouth.

DOLL

She she picks up the mop she was using as a cane and starts spanking us both with, "BAD GIRL! BAD GIRL!" all the time her little frame is shaking with laughter. We were laughing SO hard!! All the while back to her house, as we helped her in, she kept saying,

"Funny girls....you funny girls! So silly! Make me wet.....so funny!" 

Ah! Can't we take her home with us?? She's a gem for sure, and we always come away from visiting her with new laughs and good memories;)

When we visited her on the weekend, she introduced us to her upstairs "friend"/tenant. He walked in and introduced himself with, "Hey, nice to meet you. My name's BRIGHAM."

And you're not Mormon?!?  Boy do we have a religion for you........I've now officially met someone who's named Brigham and who's NOT Mormon...or even heard of Mormons for that reason.       #bucketlist       #check

He agreed to a Book of Mormon and said he'd give it a try........ Wait till he hears about Utah;)

We also got to help out with the $30,000 HIGH SCHOOL SENIOR PARTY...... no joke ......it cost that much to put on. C.R.A.Z.Y. Why didn't my high school have a senior party like that......#feelingjipped

The theme was reality TV so I got to re-live the pre-mish days while tapping up pictures of Ryan Seacrest, painting coral reefs for Shark Tank, writing word bubbles for hick Si, and getting covered in Honey Boo Boo glitter.

Twist my arm.....

The member of our ward who headed all the decorating was glad for our help, and we LOVED our time there......especially since we got to meet some awesome peeps....like probable-investigators peeps......can't get enough of those;)

This week we also met with James and his family for FHE!!! Ah! it was a B.L.A.S.T.!!  James is also a past uber-fancy chef.....so of course.....he made us dinner! Steamed mussles, bacon-wrapped asparagus, white rice and onions, scallops, and a.m.a.z.i.n.g. stake....yes...it was a lot of meat......good thing I have low iron;) hahaha! And for desert, he made red velvet brownies....mmmmmmlicious! Pics below......no worries;)

We've also found more people to teach because of our outdoor planning sesh last week. We met with one of the investigators just two days ago, and we'll see where that goes. We stopped by to visit him only to find that his roommates were higher than haystacks.      #crackhousestatus    #methathon     Good time for a word of wisdom lesson, I guess;)

Oh well, what are you going to do.

The other guys live next door to us, so we run into them a lot......(living right by your investigators REALLY has its perks;) and they're all slowly, but surely starting to show interest...... one by one.......getter done;)

We're seeing the Lord working through us daily, and teaching us how to improve and trust in Him more. The work's been a bit slow, but we're starting to see that the Lord has more in mind for us than what we can see right now.

A friend wrote me this week, and got me on a craving study on Christ' repeated invitation to "walk with him" in the scriptures. To me, that's one of the sweetest messages, especially for missionaries. 

Sometimes missionary work can seem like a lonely road. You're away from family, friends, hobbies, school, dating, and yes......twitter and pinterest.....but reading about the Savior's deeply personal invitation to all (esp his full-time servants), "Walk WITH me" opened my eyes to the power and comfort He extends.


We're not in this alone. 


EVER. As a missionary, you walk with Him--the most powerful and loving Being. It's His work. And you're His child.  His missionary.  His hands. 


Walk with Him. Take His hand.


"You let them know that when they struggle, when they are rejected, when they are spit upon and cast out and made a hiss and a byword. They are standing shoulder to shoulder with the best life this world has ever known. The only pure and perfect missionary that ever lived. They have every reason to stand tall and to be grateful that the Savior and Redeemer of the world knows all about their sorrows and their afflictions. And that for a moment or two in their lives, they will understand what He went through for them." (Elder Holland, at a Mission President's Seminar)

'

Onward and Upward,




Sister Anna Parker

post-part prep photo shoot:) #noshame

the james special..

mmmmmmmmm...

red velvet goodness